Getting a Bit Stronger

The first week home I was very tired and still needed to take anti nausea meds 2-3 times per day. The last few days I finally feel a little better than that, not as tired, still have queasiness but I am not taking anti nausea meds any more.

I have to give credit where credit is due for this. I started walking every day (as required). And thanks to my friend Lisa (an oncology nurse) who asked me if I was walking and mentioned that it makes a big difference. Indeed it does.

Photos are from right before I left for Boston, but my hair looks exactly the same (maybe a fraction of a centimeter more of fuzz).

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Heather

I never thought I’d be writing a blog, and certainly not one that is all about me, and yet, here I am. For me life has always been interesting, not mundane, not always exciting per se, but hardly ever the norm. When I say “It’s always something…” I don’t hear it as my life is a mess, it;s always something. It’s more of life is challenging and evolving and messy and inspiring and wondrous, it’s always something. I grew up in suburbia, buy my grandfather was the head of the Communist Party in the U.S. I was raised keeping that a secret, so that was something. I am tall, always have been, really tall (6’1″), I was taller than every human being in my elementary school when I was in 6th grade, that is still something. My parents divorced in my teens. I got a full basketball scholarship to Duke University. I married my high school basketball coach, 18 years my senior. I raised a stepson. I had two amazing kids of my own. We had a multicultural household, secular christian (I guess that’s what I would call it, you know Santa and the Easter Bunny) and Judaism, I used to say if it was a holiday – we celebrated it! We were uber involved in our community, mostly through youth athletics, coaching, managing and spectating. Our kids grew up, I started a photography business on the side (I hope to share some photos here) and we planned to travel a bit together, went to Portugal for our 25th anniversary and then my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer, initially they gave him 5 years, but he only survived for a little over two. I was going to say lived, but really, it was more like surviving. That, indeed, was something. I became a widow at 49. It was the worst thing that ever happened to me. But, then it was something in another way. I relearned who I was. You don’t realize how much of you becomes a combination of you and another person in a relationship. And not in a bad way, it is essential, and you don’t lose yourself, you just evolve. And I found myself suddenly alone, and learning about myself and who I had become over the years, what was just me, and what was part of who we were together. Which in retrospect, was probably hardest on those around me who had gotten used to the old me, or never even knew the original me. A year later I found love again. Sold my home of 31 years and moved closer to work. I became more fit, ate more healthfully and was amazed that I could be happy, truly happy, in the wake, no not wake, but the shadow of such profound grief. And that is truly something, something amazing and unexpected. And then, through some routine blood work in April 2014, and a visit to a hematologist and bone marrow biopsy in May, I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma. And so, yes, for me right now it’s multiple myeloma, but that is not all, there are still highs and joys, and the mundane and the rest, but something like cancer does cast a pretty long shadow.

13 thoughts on “Getting a Bit Stronger”

  1. Walking sounds great and I’ve got to believe sticking your tongue out and making faces must help. At least it helps me to see you make faces. Love you.

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  3. Heather, keep walking. You look great and we are so glad to hear you are feeling better.
    Sending lots of love, Kim, Paul and Birdie

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  4. Heather,
    So good to hear how well you are progressing and it is a good reminder for me to walk, too. Keep up the good self-care and keep getting stronger. Missing your contributions here.
    Ann Marie

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  7. Looking Good! Happy to hear things are going well and you are comfortable at home!
    I think you look great in the lovely Halloween hair style. Maybe you could rock that for a while. These days it probably wouldn’t even cause a second glance.
    Be well! 🤗🙏🏻

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  8. Yay for feeling better!!! Walking is great for exercise and it’s also great for so much more. I think this is a perfect prescription along with lots of couch time with Lola. I assume your doctor recommended that as well!!

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