Day +10

I am totally over the hump!

My WBC tripled to 0.25.  I have only needed a tiny bit of nausea meds. No nap today. Had a good walk. AND the medical team is looking at a Monday discharge (although I keep calling it “release”). The details will be confirmed tomorrow. 

I am taking in fluids like I’m in a competition as adequate drinking is a condition of my release, I mean discharge. 

Had a double decker visit today. My sister is here for a 2 day stint and my dad hopped on a train leaving my new baby nephew behind in Brooklyn to see me. 

As I start thinking about heading home I have to give a shout out to the village who takes care of and loves my little Minka – moo (pictured above).  Scot let me FaceTime with her every night until Kyle took her for a long visit. He has sent me several pics of her being her whackadoodle self. His roommate Tyler sent me an adorable video of her with him asking her “to say Hi to your Momma”. His other roommate Casey posted a photo on Facebook of the Minkster playing with his parents’ dog. And finally my friend Alison who picked up the dog from Kyle’s to take her for a hike in the valley, her favorite spot in Trumbull. This all makes it much easier to be away from her knowing she is getting all that love. 

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I never thought I’d be writing a blog, and certainly not one that is all about me, and yet, here I am. For me life has always been interesting, not mundane, not always exciting per se, but hardly ever the norm. When I say “It’s always something…” I don’t hear it as my life is a mess, it;s always something. It’s more of life is challenging and evolving and messy and inspiring and wondrous, it’s always something. I grew up in suburbia, buy my grandfather was the head of the Communist Party in the U.S. I was raised keeping that a secret, so that was something. I am tall, always have been, really tall (6’1″), I was taller than every human being in my elementary school when I was in 6th grade, that is still something. My parents divorced in my teens. I got a full basketball scholarship to Duke University. I married my high school basketball coach, 18 years my senior. I raised a stepson. I had two amazing kids of my own. We had a multicultural household, secular christian (I guess that’s what I would call it, you know Santa and the Easter Bunny) and Judaism, I used to say if it was a holiday – we celebrated it! We were uber involved in our community, mostly through youth athletics, coaching, managing and spectating. Our kids grew up, I started a photography business on the side (I hope to share some photos here) and we planned to travel a bit together, went to Portugal for our 25th anniversary and then my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer, initially they gave him 5 years, but he only survived for a little over two. I was going to say lived, but really, it was more like surviving. That, indeed, was something. I became a widow at 49. It was the worst thing that ever happened to me. But, then it was something in another way. I relearned who I was. You don’t realize how much of you becomes a combination of you and another person in a relationship. And not in a bad way, it is essential, and you don’t lose yourself, you just evolve. And I found myself suddenly alone, and learning about myself and who I had become over the years, what was just me, and what was part of who we were together. Which in retrospect, was probably hardest on those around me who had gotten used to the old me, or never even knew the original me. A year later I found love again. Sold my home of 31 years and moved closer to work. I became more fit, ate more healthfully and was amazed that I could be happy, truly happy, in the wake, no not wake, but the shadow of such profound grief. And that is truly something, something amazing and unexpected. And then, through some routine blood work in April 2014, and a visit to a hematologist and bone marrow biopsy in May, I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma. And so, yes, for me right now it’s multiple myeloma, but that is not all, there are still highs and joys, and the mundane and the rest, but something like cancer does cast a pretty long shadow.

5 thoughts on “Day +10”

  1. It is a whoohoo day! I can hear it in your blog! Peace, faith and love and also a look over the mountain. Carol


  2. This is the best news ever!! I have been following your blog as well as my friend’s son-in-law’s progress from stem cell. He will be 21 days on Monday when he is scheduled to come home too! Good thoughts and Loving vibes must help!


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